If I’m Being Honest

Confessions of a Pastor

It’s Saturday night. Had to run to the church to do a few things to get ready for Sunday. As I walk through the sanctuary the excitement begins to build up anticipating what was in store for us tomorrow! Then it hits be like a ton of bricks as I walk past certain pews. It is almost as if these pews have a voice. What they say troubles me, but then I realize it is not the pews talking. The troubled voice is coming from my own mind and heart. As I move from pew to pew, I am bombarded by memories of past occupants that are either not consistent or completely gone. Each seat tells a story. Here is a crayon mark on the seat where the next great artist colored a little too far outside the lines. This spot has notes in the song book holder from a dear saint that is now in heaven. Oh, how I miss seeing and hearing her worship. There is prime real estate under that pew where a little farmer planted many acres of crops in the carpet while I preached. I see stains in the carpet from those that came straight to church with their work clothes on because they did not want to miss anything that God was doing. As I continue to navigate through the sea of pews my heart was eased as I recalled the faithful ones who are always in their place and always involved. The truth is God has been good to us here, but I must confess some things. The morning will come, and I once again will find myself wondering. Will they be in their place today? I wonder where they are. Did I do something to make them mad? Did I not do enough? Will anyone be here to partake of the meal that I have prepared all week in preparation to feed them with the word of God today? Am I that bad at pastoring? Will the church ever grow spiritually and physically? Are there workers out there that will listen to God if He sends them to help in this ministry? The truth is many pastors face these problems and questions weekly, and it weighs heavy on their hearts. We only want to see God work in the lives of people and be a part of a strong faithful church. If I’m being honest, I am concerned at the condition of the local church and wonder how long it will survive. I know there are some churches that are full of people that love the Lord and are involved in the assembly they belong to. I also know there are pastors everywhere that are trying to perform spiritual CPR to try and keep their little assembly alive because they see the potential and know that God has placed them there. What can you do you ask? Pray, be in your place, and participate.